HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO HIS MAJESTY KING BHUMIBOL
His Majesty King Bhumibol celebrates his birthday today. His Majesty has turned a monumental 80 years old. If you were not aware, King Bhumibol is King Rama 9 of the Chakri Dynasty. His Majesty is revered as a god by many devout Buddhists and he remains the longest reining monarch in the world. Here in the City Of Angels, every road will be lined with people paying their respects. His Majesty King Bhumibol is without a doubt, one of the most beloved King’s in Thailand’s history. Probably even more so than last year, a sea of saffron will sweep across Bangkok, when multitudes of Thais will don their Royal Coronation shirts. Congratulations and celebrations to a truly noble Royal leader. Long live the King!
BANGKOK’S BARS ARE OPEN TONIGHT
It’s green for go! Bangkok’s bars will be open tonight right across the City Of Angels. The main two neon jungles namely, Nana Plaza and Soi Cowboy will be fully operational. This is terrific news for Bangkok and once again dispels the myth about Bangkok having a poor nightlife scene. After the bars and go-go bars close at around 2:00 AM, there are late night clubs where you can dance and party until your heart’s content. For those of you who have your dancing shoes on, then mosey on over to Spice Club (Ambassador Hotel, Sukhumvit Soi 11). There will be a lot of familiar female faces at Spice Club, if you hang around lower Sukhumvit Road’s nightlife venues. For a late night venue Spice Girls is a real hot spot. The music tends to be “hip hop” but the place comes alive with dancing dolls. Simply because, after 2:00 AM this is where the dolly birds love to hang out and party. Most nights it is electric between 2:00 AM and 5:00 AM. Check it out party people!
Shakerz Coyote Club – Above Swan Bar – Soi Nana – Bangkok
HEY MAN IT’S REALLY COOL!
And so, the cool season is upon us. This week I witnessed a noticeable drop in temperature. The locals are wearing all kinds of HUGE jackets, coats and hats; if only they knew what a harsh winter was! The monsoon rains have subsided in Bangkok and Pattaya, and we have switched to English summertime mode. Mind you, the cold showers make you shudder at first. Buuuurgh! Let’s hope that the Thai girls are so cold that they need a cuddle… Even better, do they need a bed warmer?
CATHOUSE IS NOT PUSSYFOOTING AROUND
Recently I was chatting to Willem, the amiable owner of Cathouse Bar the other night. While some Bangkok bar bosses are raising their drinks prices, Willem has decided to lower his. Hooray! The new Happy Hour in Cathouse now runs all night long (3:00 PM until 2:00 AM) It is a kind of “7 ELEVEN” because you can enjoy Happy Hour for ELEVEN hours a day, 7 days a week! The old fashioned “all you can drink” offers are now history. Check out the new beer prices…
Heineken, Beer Lao, and San Miguel = 79 Baht. Singha, Tiger, and Chang = 69 Baht.
SUNDAY SPECIAL — The last Sunday of every month — All Beers ONLY 59 Baht ALL NIGHT LONG. Cheers for the cheap beers!
ORIENTATION – Cat House Bar is located directly above Big Dogs Bar on the middle level in Nana Plaza. She sits next to Farang Connection which still remains closed.
HORNYTHOLOGY — THE STUDY OF DOLLY BIRDS
Bird watching is a popular pastime in Western counties. Here in Thailand a growing trend is “dolly bird watching.” You can easily spot the rows sitting in Big Dogs Bar, watching the dolly birds head into Nana Plaza in the late afternoon, and early evening. One guy in particular has taken it a step further. While he sits watching the dolly birds come in, he has one of the young kids who hangs around the vicinity on standby. This is in order to LoJack the girl. For the people who don’t know what LoJack is, it is a location transmitter hidden someplace in a car, that can be activated by the police to track the car if it is stolen. When an attractive dolly is spotted, he signals his LoJack liaison to follow her. The kid detects where she works and then reports back. Later in the evening, the eager beaver will head to that location. The rest you can figure out.
A friend of mine known around the internet chat boards as Slapman, uses a more direct hijack technique. He perches himself close to the exit in Big Dogs Bar. When an attractive dolly bird approaches he springs into action. Actually, “spring” is no exaggeration. On occasion he has sprung up so fast that he almost startles the poor dolly bird away. He whips out his little black book like a policeman on overtime. Then he rapidly jots down the usual name, rank, and number and allows her to proceed on her way. I am pleased to say that Slapman does hornythology proud — he has collected more birds than a king-sized aviary.
SATURDAY NIGHT FEVER AT SISTERZ GO-GO BAR
Sisterz Go-Go Bar is located right in the heart of Walking Street, Pattaya. Following the success of the recent party night in Sisterz Go-Go Bar, there will be another one this Saturday, December 8th. Sisterz Go-Go Bar owner Ricky says that it will follow the same format as the last party. On the night there will be plenty of free food, party games, competitions and lots of prizes. Audience participation during the party games is encouraged and there will be free drinks for the winners.
Tricky Ricky commented, “Customers wishing to participate should let me know on the night. It would be advisable to check that your health insurance is up to date. Our girls play rough, when the prizes include money or booze. However, if it all gets too much for you, our Sisterz can show you where to lie down and recover.”
The party starts at 9:30 PM and all are welcome to join in the fun and frolics. We are assured that the “Human Hoover” will be on top form in the party games. Be warned that she will suck-seed!
XXX FILES — LIFE’S A FUNNY OLD GAME!
“My wife is into oral sex, she always talks me out of it.” (Dave The Rave 2007).
EMAIL — Davetheravebangkok@gmail.com
DON’T BE A FOOL PROTECT YOUR TOOL
In the meantime, if you can’t be good be careful… Safe sex saves lives!
