Thailand Night Fever

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AFTER DARK ASIA VOLUME 5 - THAILANDI decided to take a night off and visit Soi Cowboy with a friend.  I needed to go to Soi Cowboy to write an update for my website, and the “booze & babes” investigation suited my friend.  We arranged to meet at Tilac Bar, where you can relax outside and watch the world go by.  My friend was running late, so I went inside Tilac Bar.  Immediately, I saw Jay standing at the bar.  Jay is a bubbly Englishman who is always chatty and so, we talked for a while.  I ordered a San Mig Lite (as you do).  Then I was pleasantly surprised to receive a bill for a mere 60 Baht.  The service girl was polite and flashed me a warm smile, as she went about her duties. 

One very good reason to start your evening in Soi Cowboy is to take advantage of the excellent drinks deals on offer.  Unlike Nana Plaza, almost every single bar in Soi Cowboy has a Happy Hour.  Tilac Bar and Black & White Bar both have a Happy Hour that runs until 9:00pm.  Better still is the fact that they all offer local beers and spirits at only 60 Baht.  When you see the “birthday suit babes” in Long Gun and Raw Hide, this has to be the best drinks deal in the whole of Bangkok.

Tilac Bar recently received a serious remodel and it is almost futuristic in design.  Tilac now has an “all things bright and beautiful” look about the place.  It is reported to be doing a brisk trade.  Tilac was very busy last Friday night, but on Monday night, it was quiet.  When I walked into Tilac at approaching 9:00pm, there was only a scattering of customers.  I was surprised because the Happy Hour alone should be reason enough to draw the crowds.  I thought that the line-up on Monday was all right, but nothing to get too excited about.  The Tilac go-go girls wear a top and a skirt, but because they are so forgetful, the up skirt view is rather enticing!  Tilac Bar is definitely worth a visit, even if it is just to take advantage of the super saver Happy Hour… That is of course, while you admire the scenery.   

SAN MIG LITE BEER IN BANGKOK THAILANDI finished my beer, paid my 60 Baht bill and walked over to Long Gun Go-Go Bar.  I have been visiting Long Gun for the best part of 20 years and amazingly, it still draws a good crowd.  It has to be something of a Bangkok institution after all these decades.  I ordered a beer and it was 125 Baht, which is a good drinks deal compared to general go-go bar prices these days.  It was after 9:00pm and I was surprised how easily I was able to get a seat, but it was a Monday night.  By the way, don’t those church pew seats just kill you?  Some people cannot understand why Long Gun has never been renovated in its entire history.  Perhaps I am a bit weird, but I kind of like the rough and ready feel of Long Gun.  However, in saying that, I must admit that those toilets are a disaster zone.  I think they were built in the days of the Wild West!

BANG!  A showgirl’s boot slams down onto the stage, after she falls from the flying splits.  Her firm breasts barely wobble from the crash landing.  My timing was fortunate, because one of my all-time favourite go-go shows was on.  Whilst I took the first sip of amber arouser, a broad smile appeared in my minds eye.  I love the Rock Show in Long Gun and Raw Hide.  No matter how many times I see it I always enjoy admiring the acrobatic athleticism.  The Rock Show as I refer to it, comprises of a series of rock songs, which includes “Hells Bells” by the legendary band AC/DC. 


The show ended and I went across to Tilac Bar to meet my friend.  Sanook Shaun had very kindly ordered us two Erdinger Beers.  (Erdinger is the most popular of the German wheat beers that are available in Thailand).  We were sitting at a table outside Sam 2000 Pub & Restaurant.  The large 500ml bottle appeared in front of me, along with a tall German beer glass.  I had not sunk an Erdinger Beer in a long time and it went down very smoothly.  Remember that this is 500ml of imported German wheat beer, so one bottle costs 195 Baht.  I think it is a fair price, but on this occasion, Dave The Rave was being treated to one.  Cheers Shaun!

Surveying the scene, I noticed that a nearby table of Japanese tourists visibly cringed, when bargirls walked over and bought various insects from a meals-on-wheels vendor.  Four farangs sat at another table were eating an assortment of Thai dishes.  The food came from Sam 2000 Bar & Restaurant and when I read the menu, I discovered that the prices were very reasonable.  The food looked delicious, but I was on a “booze & babes” mission.  In a short space of time, no less than three Indian hawkers came to our table and tried to sell us a wristwatch.  The elephant mahout with a memory span of a gold fish asked us numerous times if we wanted to feed Jumbo.  And then, a cheeky little flower seller called my friend a Cheap Charlie.  That was funny, because we were sat there drinking 195 Baht Erdinger Beers.  Sanook Shaun is far from cheap!  We realised that it was time to move on…

Next on my list was Raw Hide Go-Go Bar.  Just as good luck would have it, the Rock Show was on.  This time I ordered a bottle of water and I was pleasantly surprised (yet again) to get a bill for just 65 Baht.  I merrily popped the bill back into the bill cup after reading the good news.  The service girl smiled when she saw an expression of sheer glee right across my ghost white face.  I just love being the Prisoner In Paradise!  (A Sojourn To Soi Cowboy continues next week, so stay tuned folks). 



Even though January is just ending, the number of tourists throughout the majority of Thailand is already beginning to taper off.  With the exception of Phuket, the number of tourists across Thailand’s nightspots is beginning to decrease.  I hear sighs of relief coming from the expat residents, who can now safely emerge from silly season hibernation.  Don’t worry guys; it is safe to come out now!  Mind you, in saying that the guys in Pattaya are becoming seriously outnumbered by dolly birds.  The momentum and therefore advantage has swung back to the resident sexpats.  Party on! 


I am pleased to announce that Cathouse in Nana Plaza is now running their daily Happy Hour from 4:00pm-8:00pm.  The Happy Hour local beers are only 59 Baht each.  They include Chang, Heineken, Tiger, Singha and Beer Lao.  San Mig Lite is 69 Baht and Beer Lao Dark is available all night long at 99 Baht.  Cathouse also offers some Special Shots during their 4:00pm-8:00pm Happy Hour.  Sambuka, Tequila, Vodka and even Fisherman’s Friend shooters are all only 49 Baht each.

Willem, the friendly co-owner of Cathouse approached me and said, “I will give you a Fisherman’s Friend.”  Well, I don’t mind telling you that Dave The Rave wondered what he had let myself in for.  I am a straight guy and did not want a fisherman’s anything, anywhere near me!  However, I was relieved to learn that it was a special shooter.  Thank goodness for that!   

Incidentally, the barfine in Cathouse is very reasonable at 500 Baht.  Although Willem is a lovely guy, he is not on the menu.  Willem is married, so please keep your hands to yourself!


Mercury Go-Go Bar has reintroduced its Happy Hour.  Situated three doors down from Cathouse, it is now under new ownership.  The revised Happy Hour runs from 7:00pm-9:00pm.  Local beers and spirits are all 90 Baht.  Draught Beer is available during Happy Hour for only 65 Baht.  


The boys in brown have visited a few go-go bars in Nana Plaza over the past couple of weeks.  Spankys Go-Go Bar located next to Angelwitch was the latest place for the Thai authorities to “extract the urine.”  I kid you not; they were taking urine samples from some of the go-go dancers in Spankys last Friday night to test for drug abuse.  This quite eccentric activity brings a new meaning to the British expression “taking the piss!”


FLYING TO BANGKOK THAILANDThe late night party options are definitely emerging again amid the City Of Angels.  Sin Rooftop Garden is back in action again.  Situated above the 7 ELEVEN just past bus Stop in Soi Nana, Sin are now open until 4:00am.  Sin also has a kitchen, which takes orders from early evening right up until 3:00am.  The friendly farang chef is Paul, who has been specially flown in from London, England.  Paul puts his individual twist and flare to enhance Sin’s pub grub.  Considering that Sin is offering a late night option, their local beers and spirits are super value-for-money at only 110 Baht.  I suppose you could be termed as a “sinner” if you visit often enough.  And so, don’t worry guys, you can still live it up in Sin! 


Dave The Rave’s sources have confirmed that the newly formed Thai Government will introduce a nationwide public smoking ban.  It will come into effect next month, but it is thought that it will not be implemented during the first half of February.  All entertainment establishments and restaurants must comply, or face a hefty 20,000 Baht fine.  Individuals who are caught smoking in these establishments could face a 2,000 Baht fine.  So guys don’t be seen holding your butt outside the bars, while we are all enjoying ourselves inside!

As if smoking is not bad enough, it could now cost smokers a hefty fine. 



Shadow Sports Bar in Soi Cowboy will be showing the American Football Super Bowl live.  The New England Patriots will battle it out against the New York Giants on Monday, February 4th.  On the morning of the special event Shadow Sports Bar are offering a 150 Baht buffet breakfast.  The bar will be open at 7:00am for the kick off at 8:00am.  Unfortunately, Shadow Sports Bar put the wrong times on their banner.  Shadow Bar opens at 5:30am and the game kicks off at around 6:15am.  Quite a lot of Americans complain that few bars are interested in showing their national sports.  Well guys, here is a great opportunity to enjoy the Super Bowl in a modern sports bar with a selection of seven screens.  May the best team win.  Enjoy!


Located where the BTS Sala Daeng Skytrain Station meets Silom near Soi Thaniya, O’Reillys Irish Pub lies in the heart of the night market area.  O’Reillys Pub is a lively mixture of Irish hospitality blended with live sports, live music, traditional pub grub, and a cosmopolitan crowd.  O’Reillys offer a superb Happy Hour of 50% off, which runs from 4:00pm until 7:00pm.  The Happy Hour includes Heineken and Tiger available in both draught and bottle form.  Draught beers include Guinness, Kilkenny, Heineken, Tiger, John Smith’s Bitter and Strongbow Cider.   O’Reillys Irish Pub also offers a Happy House Special with Johnnie Walker Red Label available on a “Buy 1 Get 1 Free” basis.  In addition, the Johnnie Walker Red drinks deal runs all day every day.      

The recently updated menu includes fine farang fare and Thai favourites too.  Entertainment includes the famous Asian Beatles tribute band.  Beatles fans can enjoy “The Better” perform every Friday night.  O’Reillys has recently hired Danny as their new manager.  Danny was the former manager of the Ball In Hand Pool Hall.  We wish him luck in his new position.  Check it out!



It is time for a last call for the Thai pop star Sek Loso’s concert.  Don’t forget Thai pop fans that Sek Loso is performing live in Hillary 2 Bar this Saturday, February 2nd.         


Thailand is the only country that I know of, where lady-boys are classed as a third sex.  (Dave The Rave 2008).


Wine lovers would simply cringe!  The other night I witnessed a Thai woman order a glass of red wine.  It was already chilled, which seems the norm here in many Bangkok bars.  But, then to my horror she proceeded to plop several ice cubes into her (already chilled) red wine.  From the bible I have heard of turning water into wine, but I have never heard of turning wine into water.  Stop the insanity!



Angelwitch Go-Go Bar located on the middle level in Nana Plaza, sees the return of two top Showgirls.  The two superstars of the stage are the spinningly scrumptious Miss May, and the tremendously talented Miss Jo Jo.  Those of you that know Jo Jo realise that her attendance in any go-go bar is rather unpredictable to say the very least.  There is more chance of four aces turning up in one hand!  Nevertheless, we enjoy her special guest appearances to perform those exciting solo shows.  When Jo Jo says to the Boss, “Hi, I’m back again.”  Matt jokingly replies, “For how many days?”  Her attendance is so up and down that I call her “Jo Jo the Yo-Yo.” 


This week I was pleasantly surprised by a visit from one of Thailand’s bestselling authors, the charismatic Andrew Hicks.  Andrew, who wrote Thai Girl was very impressed by the shows in Angelwitch.  So much so, he thinks that “Bangkok Broadway” has much more finesse than its counterparts do.  Andrew commented, “This is brilliant, it’s erotic ballet.”  Complimentary words indeed from the talented writer.

Andrew’s first Thailand novel Thai Girl has become very popular.  Rapidly approaching 15,000 copies have been sold.  Thai Girl is available in 300 bookshops throughout Thailand.  The blurb on the cover provocatively asks, “Seductive, scheming and available?  Or is the Thai Girl modest, sweet and innocent… Is it she who is the victim?”   



Butterfly Bob walked into his former Thai girlfriend’s bar the other night… Unfortunately, it was an iron bar.

The man with the reflective dome went to a posh hairdresser the other day.  Dave The Rave asked, “How much for a haircut?”  The hairdresser replied, “350 Baht Sir.”  Then I asked her, “How much for a shave?”  The woman replied, “50 Baht Sir.”  So, I said, “OK, shave my head.”


Unfortunately, I have been forced to remove some people from my emailing list, because their emails keep bouncing back.  Please REGISTER again with your updated email address, or email me your new email address.  If you are not receiving my emails, it could be due to oversensitive spam filters.  It is worth checking… Well, I hope I am worth checking!

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In the meantime, if you cannot be good be careful… Safe sex saves lives!

The Prisoner In Paradise wishes to thank you for visiting…

Dave The Rave — Go-Go Guru.